Being a mother is being brave. From carrying a parasite fetus for 9 months, sleepless nights, teaching toddlers, disciplining them, watching them grow up, providing their needs, etc. It's not an easy task.
Exactly why I can't imagine myself having kids in the future. Well, as of 06/26/19, at least.
Months ago, I was thinking of undergoing tubal ligation or whatever method is available to permanently not have babies. Eeeehhhh hiddenblade coward woman you not deserve to have vag cos you not wanna perform the role you supposed to do. Yeah, the thought of it is terrifying for me.
First of all, I have PTSD because of some shit that happened inside an operating room in a hospital. Giving birth will most likely take you to the OR. I don't want to experience it again. Hmm give birth at home? Giving birth will make you scream, and screaming will give me flashbacks. So...
Okay, granting I survive giving birth. Will I be able to take care of the baby? When I couldn't even take care of myself properly.
Will I ever survive the guilt of bringing life into this fucked up world? Will this kid be able to live a normal life in the future? Garbages in our seas, global warming, war, dying trees, and other bad things going on around us. Our world is overpopulated. Why would I want another living being to suffer in this world?
No, I'm not bashing babies though I love bullying them XD. I don't secretly judge people having babies too. In fact, I am happy for them. Much respect for those who are doing their best to raise kids even though they are struggling financially.
But thaaaat toooo. There are so many kids in the streets, most of them are orphans. And those kids getting kidnaped for their organs and shit. I don't want to see more kids in the streets. If they can't afford to have a baby, can they do their best NOT to have one? :(
Back to it, I am happy for those people who are starting a family. Yay babies who will scream randomly at 3am :D. But I just don't want it personally.
Another reason, I don't want my future kid to yell at me and say
I never asked to be born!
Because honestly, I never asked to be born. If I had the chance to choose, I would never choose life. Lol. I know it will break my parents' hearts if I told them that... and that's why I am afraid my kid would say that. Just accept the life you were given Eeeerrrrrrrrr ok xD
But you should be grateful you can bear a child. Others cannot ever bear a child so it will be disrespectful to them if you don't
Not my problem and not my fault. xD
Buuuuut keep in mind this was written by a 22-year-old lost girl who still cannot figure out what to do in her life. This might change in the future, of course... especially that I met someone who changed my perspective in love and life. Will hiddenblade have child[ren] in the future or not? Find out in the next episode......... XD
Also a Self Portrait above. :D
If you do change your mind, never let anyone else change it. You yourself are the only one who you should change your mind for.
Like coming from my mouth. I'm sure my mom didn't want to hear when I said this to her long ago. But then again that's a risk every parent has to take. That a parent ends up being blamed by their children. Being a parent is selfish. I should know. I'm a parent.
I agree with everything that you said. So great that you are aware of these things as a parent. Most will just guilt trip their kids and would say "I brought you into this world so you should be grateful!" like you owe them...
awwww blade
nothing wrong with not wanting kids, I think you'd be a great mom tho.
The world having problems.... ya, but like, raising kids with a lot of love is probably the best way to solve those problems
world has probably always had problems, we just have the internet and stuff and can see all the problems now lol.. it'll keep getting better
(plenty of reasons not to want kids, I just mean I wouldn't worry about the world.. the world can smh)
interesting about what if they don't want to be born 😲
You can be like, then u shouldn't have won the race, speedy ass sperm motherfucker
jk but maybe they'll like being alive and be like yayyyy ty mommy
idk.. interesting to read all that 😃
A lot of people I think rush into kids without any reason why or really wanting them. Cool that you're thinking about it, and only wanting to do it if it seems right for you.
I'd be a great mom if I am fully ready I guess.
hahaha I've never thought of that. Yeah why did I swim to that egg urhghhgg
So true. And the kids end up having a broken family and a broken heart.. (well, most, as what I have seen)
Not having kids is the best!!
My opinion right now too lol
This post is not gonna age well. ;P
Wanna prove it? :P
Your kid is gonna find this and be like "wtf mom?" :D
I'll just gonna tell him/her "Your dad forced me to post this". xD
Your mission is your mission. You know best how to accomplish it. The struggle I recognize in you does make for great Art though, cherish it :D
Thank you for your kind words! I don't know yet how to accomplish my mission though but I will get there.
I think your thoughts are perfectly normal for someone aged 22. You'll probably start considering things differently when approaching 30.
Not saying that from one day to the other your deepest wish will be to have kids but you will start thinking about it more often and it will feel less scary over time.
Thank you! Most of the people that I know don't think this way though but good to know it's normal in your opinion. Makes me feel I'm on the right path.
One point: We're not actually overpopulated. I'm not really sure why the media likes to propagate that myth. The conspiracy part of my brain has it's hypotheses.
The entire human population could actually fit in suburbs cover an area the size of Spain. Spain isn't a small country by any means, but that's also suburbs, which are evil incarnate. We also could fit in a small number of very large cities.
The main problem is feeding everybody...which isn't really a problem...it's only annoying because it's not cheap. The current way we feed everyone is planting a single crop on a large space of land, then using machinery to harvest it.
We have robots now. That's not an issue anymore. We can now start planting multiple crops, in forests if we want, using hydroponics, growing far more food for the amount of land.
We actually already grow more food than the world needs. The reason some starve is due to greed and waste and shortages in particular areas. But we could easily increase our population several times it's current size without any real issues. Food might increase in price...but it's already insanely priced in many areas, mainly just due to greed.
Can we fit there while living comfortably? Dunno though. Overpopulation is real here, at least in my country.
No one lives comfortably in suburbs. They're hell. It's much better when you live closer to people that aren't horrible nasty people, which everyone turns into in suburbs. They're just little boxes segregating everyone into their own little tiny area. It's better when you have your own little tiny area for some things, but have to actually interact and get along with people most of the time.
Most overpopulation is actually a problem of poor design. We all live in tiny boxes in various places. We're segregated into living areas for sound and pollution reasons...but that also means that when we have to go to anywhere, the traffic to that area is insane.
You gotta split up common places people would go into small little satellite locations. Little restaurants in resident areas. Some residents in commercial areas. There are people that go to school and study how to do it properly to ensure there arean't these problems. And once you stop being super cheap and insisting everything go back to ground level, it makes it a lot easier.
You'll be surprised how nature works. It'll catch you, eventually.
You'll be surprised how
Nature works. It'll catch you,
Eventually.
- oldtimer
I'm a bot. I detect haiku.
Thank you! Yeah, my thoughts will definitely change in the future. Just not sure how.
That's a very high-quality photo.
Thank you!
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i ... dread looking at the comments section for replies that will softly try to convince you that you are not quite in the right opinion, hiddi :3 (hope i will be proven wrong) (but i can already feel their tentative and soft desires to tell women that not wanting to have kids might not be the best thing to publicize out loud)
anyway, you do you <3 even if you change your mind in the future, i respect present!hiddi's feelings, values, thoughts and experiences <3 <3 <3
also, that photo is stunning girllllllllllllllllll * ___ *
you called it, spoder!!!
Trueeee. Well it's 2019. People should know that some (if not most) millennials prefer to have pets than kids. Or prefer to be financially stable first and mentally prepared before having them. Thank you spidey <3
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your thoughts are close to me, but you still have a lot of time to change your mind
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Aww, so nice to have someone with the same thoughts. We'll see :D
Same, V. I feel just the same. Hell if I have the choice now I still wouldn't. But like you said it's a little too late now coos we're in this shit already! Fu@#$*k!!!!
Honestly most people just have kids cs its the norm or cos they're lonely or want to fit in or whatever. Or they want to continue their "family line" which IMO is sentimental and dumb!
Anyway I'm with you, and if I ever choose to have kids I'm sure it will be because I've finally succumb to one of those reasons and have become sentimental and dumb myself.
I CANNOT wait!!!!!
Haha, yeah. We just have to accept life, even if we never wanted to.
SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!! lol so true. In my country, people just have kids because they think of kids as investment plans. "Don't worry if we are poor and stupid today, we shall have MANY kids cos in the future they will work hard to help us raise the other 8 kids. They won't have their own life because they will support us and get us away from poverty. When we grow old, they will take care of us because we don't have our own savings. If they don't give us money, we will condemn them cos how dare they!" So stupid and fucked up.
People should have kids because they believe life is beautiful and needs to be experienced. Not cos they think kids are investment plans or some dumb machine who will work for them.
Hmmmm.... Have a nice day @hiddenblade nice post 😊
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Ikaw rin. Salamat XD
Reminds me of Star Wars 4, A New Hope.