‘Shoulding’ is like covfefe; it’s no where in the dictionary. Although this word may seem new to many, it is actually a word that has enslaved most of us.
You’ve often heard people using phrases like:
I am 23 years I ‘should’ get married.
I ‘should’ enroll in a given course because it runs in our family.
Its lunch time I ‘should’ go grab something.
I should do this; I should do that; I should, I should, I should….
‘Shoulding’ means taking away your freedom of thinking and conforming to the rules set by the society. But how can you overcome ‘shoulding’ over your life?
Overcoming ‘shoulding’ over your life is simple; just take control over your life by disconnecting from the rules set by the society. This means, instead of making a decision just because it should be done, the best way is to follow your intuition. Think through any decision that you want to make to examine whether it resonates with your gut feeling.
Look at it this way, you should not eat just because its lunch time, but only when you feel hungry. You might have attained the ‘settling age’ set by society, but marriage is far from being a priority in your mind. Therefore, don’t enter into marriage because just because of the pressure from the society, but think whether you really need to.
When you overcome ‘shoulding’ over your life, you win back your freedom and brain power. You become free and engage your whole-self in every decision that you make.
I should have cut the lawn, but the rain came.
decisions should be based on our thinking and intuitions...
This is a really insightful post thank you for sharing. In my local society (Australia) it is very common for people to settle into jobs they don't enjoy but they 'should' have. 10 years later and they regret making the decision that society tells them they "should" make instead of living the fullfilling life they wanted to.
...indeed, making decisions based on our feelings makes life to be more enjoyable..