dwelling in dysfunction and letting go.

I'm finally free from the torment.

-It sounds bad to describe my living situation as such, but the household and the couch that I just resided on (and ragingly drank on, towards the end) - is now just a distant memory. I had finally had enough.

When you don't care enough to steer the course of your own life, this type of situation is bound to happen.

- whether it's a bad relationship that causes you nothing but problems, but keeps you addicted for those few moments of sexual pleasure or the fact that you seemingly "can't leave" because of the kids or because you DEPEND on this person for some basic human necessity...  (housing, food, etc)

And although it may suck while we are going through it, being in this situation is divine, because it is teaching you an invaluable life lesson that cannot be bought, faked, (or read and assimilated) without a bit of PAIN to get the point across it never sticks. At least in my case.

But what causes one to finally decide to take action and get out ?

In short, FEAR.

Fear not achieving shit in my life and dying of some alcohol induced mishap or ending up in jail (again).

-fuck that.

-I have finally left that drug fueled, ego induced stage of a nightmare and made it safely to a new abode.

 A serendipitous room for rent I found on craigslist. 

first page, first post was the exact moment I decided I was fed up and needed a change and I couldn't have asked for a better outcome.

word to the wise- Some people of tremendous moral fiber still use craigslist. Also some very rich and successful people who haven't had time to keep up with the fads and all the new platforms!

 - the moment I decided I'd had enough and needed to make a change or face acting stupid and cowardly in some other external manifestation of defeatism. It all worked. In perfect timing. 

I no longer have to worry about my laptop being stolen while I'm at work. I have actually already picked up an extra shift in my worklife that will make a huge financial impact on my life and all it took was mainly to change my OUTLOOK. I hope all of you reading this will have a large perspective on your life as well and make change where you know you need to, but have been justifying putting off...

so here I AM,

please give feedback and interact because this is just the beginning. But we are all performance based beings, and we all get insecure, so a little divine guidance through you is all it will take ...

peace and tranquility to you! You are worth it. Get out of that situation. The amazing new one is just one decision away. You've got this.