A Futile Apology : Based On True Life Experience

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I often find myself wishing for a time machine, something that could transport us back to specific years or pivotal moments in our lives, solely to undo certain actions. It’s undeniable that we all harbor regrets and have made decisions we wish we could reverse. These moments of remorse linger with us, striking at our hearts, a constant reminder of our human propensity for mistakes. After all, to err is human, and these missteps are an inevitable part of our journey.

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If I had to pinpoint the greatest mistake or regret in my life, it would undoubtedly be tied to an incident that occurred during my undergraduate years in 2020/2021. This experience has left a lasting impact on me, one that I can never forget. However, I hold onto the hope that, with time, I will eventually be able to move past it.

What Happened in 2020/2021?

I still can’t believe how vividly the date remains etched in my memory, as if the incident occurred just yesterday, even though it happened 3 to 4 years ago.

During my undergraduate days, I was a class topper, despite being a bit shy and introverted. I spent most of my time with my friends, who were mostly guys, because I felt that associating with ladies could be a distraction from achieving my goals.

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One day, some of my friends in the department began asking if I was in a relationship with any lady. My response was always a firm "NO!" However, people found it hard to believe me. They would respond with comments like, "You, a good-looking guy, smart, with money, and you don't have a girlfriend? Are you kidding me?" Despite their sophisticated replies and teasing, I was never moved by peer pressure. I’ve always been the type of person who does what he wants, making it difficult for me to feel intimidated.

Fast Forward to FYB Week

As a diligent student committed to achieving my goals, I never allowed any distractions to affect my focus. I kept working hard, and by the special grace of God, I became popular in my department due to my outstanding performance.

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There's a common weekly event for undergraduate finalists known as Final Year Brethren (FYB) Week. While everyone else was at the field enjoying themselves with music and snacks, I was in an empty classroom researching specific cryptocurrency projects. I wanted to share my knowledge about these projects on my blog to educate my followers. Then I saw this beautiful lady walk in, her mesmerizing smile lighting up her face, making my heart skip a beat. I thought to myself, "What could be happening?" as my legs began to shake while she approached me. However, I had to maintain my composure and Steeze, trying to appear as a hard guy.

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She greeted me and sat in a different row, and we both found ourselves staring and smiling at each other. As the guy, I had to think of a way to start a conversation with her, and from there, we quickly became obsessed with each other. What seemed like love at first sight, as people often say, unfortunately ended up becoming regret at first sight.

The Misunderstanding

When you're in love with your partner, you start to act like "Tom and Jerry"—constantly calling each other, wanting to hear from each other, playing together, and becoming completely obsessed with one another.

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One day, she visited me in my apartment, expressing how much she missed me. We had a great time watching movies, eating, playing, and enjoying each other's company when a disturbing message notification popped up from an old female friend of mine whom I used to live with in the same house back then.

This old friend of mine is significantly older than me, and she has been incredibly supportive, mentoring me and providing me with things I need for school. I affectionately refer to her as a "Big Sis" because we were very close, and she makes it a point to hear from me every week to ensure I'm doing well in school.

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I received a message notification from her asking me to come online for a video call. I promptly did as she asked because she is a "Big Sis" I never joke with. As we were talking on the video call, I noticed my girlfriend looking very uncomfortable and jealous, so I ended the call to focus on her.

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I asked her, "Are you okay? What's the problem, baby?" Her first reply was, "I am done with you!" I was astonished and asked, "What's happening? Are you angry over a mere video call with my Big Sis?" I apologized to her, even though it reduced my Steeze and made me feel worthless. But I took the risk, hoping to avoid losing someone I loved.

Is the Apology Worth It?

After days and weeks of apologizing to her, I began asking myself if the apology was worth it. The person I was apologizing to wasn't moved an inch by my efforts. I recalled a particular quote: "The person who loves you won't stress you, and the person who will help you won't stress you." This means that someone who truly loves you will never cause you unnecessary stress, and someone who is genuinely there to help you will do so without making it difficult.

Move On and Maintain Your Steeze

I believe I did the right thing by apologizing to her for the misunderstanding, even though it wasn't my fault. However, she wasn't the understanding type like Chioma, Davido's wife. The best course of action was to let her go and maintain my Steeze, knowing that there are other options available.

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Sometimes, we guys can seem foolish or weak when we keep apologizing to a lady who is already tired of the relationship. The best thing to do is let them be and focus on those who truly love you for who you are. Apologies shouldn't be wasted on people who don't deserve them since it will definitely end up being futile.

About Me

I'm Adebola, a proud graduate in Agricultural Engineering (BSC). My passion for self-development and productivity drives me to constantly seek knowledge and conduct research. Over the last five years, I've immersed myself in the world of cryptocurrency and blockchain, growing more enthusiastic by the day. My diverse hobbies include reading, writing, enjoying good food, participating in agricultural activities, traveling, designing, and blogging. I possess a range of skills, including content writing, graphic design, UI/UX design, copywriting, internet marketing, research, data analysis, and basic coding. Don't hesitate to connect with me through the links below;
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Discord: Hardaeborla#103
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