60 Day Happiness Challenge - Day 0

in #happinesschallenge7 years ago

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If you've gotten this far, you're wondering what this 60 day challenge thingy is. Bare with me, and I'll give you the low-down:

A close friend of mine is going through a rough divorce - like, really rough. They've been together most of their adult lives, they run a business together, have two daughters together...and neither of them wants the divorce, but it seems necessary.

I won't go into details, but after talking with my friend yesterday, I tried to get her excited about the prospect of being single again. She'll get a clean slate, a chance to start fresh and really figure out what it is she wants out of life, and who she is - something she's lost sight of. I got really excited and decided I wanted to be her life coach. I wanted to spend the next few months helping her figure out her finances, her diet, what she needed to do to be happy, figure out what she enjoys doing...

But then it hit me - why am I so eager to do for someone else what I wouldn't - and don't - do for myself? How can I be someone's life coach if I haven't figured out my own life? (Don't worry - I'm not into any of those life-coach systems or MLMs - it was just the best phrase I could think of for helping someone redo their entire life).

I tend to lean towards depression. I won't say that I'm depressed, but it seems like my default mode is...less than happy. If 1 is suicidal and 10 is elated and 5 is neutral, I would say I tend to lean toward 3 or 4 most of the time. It just seems to be how I'm built.

Before my son was born I would have regular existential crisis. What was I doing with my life? What did I WANT to do with my life? I have so many interests, but no real passions. What would make me happy? I would try a few things here and there, but always end up wondering if I was truly living life the way it deserves. I truly believe we only get one life to live - that we need to make the most of it.

After my son was born, I had the challenge I craved - sleepless nights, breastfeeding, working, keeping house, etc. But I no longer get the wide sweeps of emotion. I'm no longer depressed, but I'm also never excited, or joyful. Maybe because I'm too tired? Maybe post-partum depression, I'm not sure.

Your Best Year Ever author Michael Hyatt breaks your life into 10 areas:

  1. spiritual
  2. physical
  3. social
  4. financial
  5. intellectual
  6. marital
  7. vocational
  8. emotional
  9. parental
  10. avocational

I plan on creating goals or habits for myself for the next 60 days to up my happiness levels. Now this may sound selfish, but I really don't think that it is. When I'm happy, I'm fun and playful, which makes my husband happy. When I'm happy, I have more time and energy to play with my kids. And when they're taken care of, they can go out into the world and be the best versions of themselves possible.

When I'm happy, I do better work at work, and are more free to give back to my friends and community. The world needs more happy people.

Luckily, it seems like I don't need 10 goals...I truly wouldn't be able to keep track of them all!

I can tackle my spiritual, physical, and emotional areas by hiking or trail running every morning after I drop the baby off. Outside in nature is where I find God, walking or running for an hour is great exercise, and exercise releases endorphins, making me happy.

Socially, I'll go out to lunch with a friend at least once a week.

Financially, I'll make payments onto my CC every paycheck and will pay it off by the end of the 60 days.

Intellectually, I'll continue to listen to audiobooks during my commute.

Maritally, I'll spend at least 15 minutes every night, without electronics, talking to my husband before we turn the TV on.

In my job, I'll spend an hour a day learning to code.

With my kids - and this may seem counter-intuitive - I'm going to eat 5 servings of fruit and veg a day. Now, hear me out! When I eat well throughout the day, I'm not chasing my blood sugar levels, and I have the sustained energy to last me throughout the day.

Avocationally, I'll work on my wordpress blog and blog for this challenge daily.

So it's really only a handful of easy, realistic goals:

  • Walk for an hour in the morning
  • Go out to lunch with a friend
  • Make payments on my CC (this is already automatic)
  • Continue my existing practice of listening to audiobooks
  • Give hubby 15 minutes of my undivided attention
  • Spend an hour at work learning to code
  • Eat 5 servings of fruit and veg a day

Easy!

So where does Steemit come into play? Well, two ways:

  1. accountability: I'm going to post daily with updates to keep me accountable. Whether I succeed or fail that day, I'm going to show up, be honest, and stick to it. @frugallady is doing an accountability post a day for her new business and I love her quick little hello's every day.

  2. comradery: join me! If you want to make a change in your life - any change, it doesn't have to involve the 10 areas above - join me! Post daily and add the tag #sixtydaychallenge. Share your wins and losses. Tips and tricks, or just ask for support. I think an entire community of happiness-drive people could truly change the world.

I start tomorrow! I hope you'll join me, or at least check on me and keep me accountable!

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Nicely written article. I think it's nice of you to volunteer to be your friends life coach. My opinion is that being happy is something that sometimes takes effort. You have to say to yourself this is my happy day. Like I sometimes just make myself choose to be happy because I deserve it and so do you and everyone else. If you are having a tough day just let it be. Accept it as a tough day or moment and like rough waters, it will pass.

This is wonderful, and a wonderful idea. I relate to so much of what you're saying. I've been feeling bleh in my marriage lately and this:

Maritally, I'll spend at least 15 minutes every night, without electronics, talking to my husband before we turn the TV on.

Seems like a great idea.
I wonder if I can find the time to participate in this :)
Thanks for sharing with us♡

It seems so simple-stupid but I think could really make a difference. We communicate throughout the day but it’s usually logistics about the baby, groceries, funny stories, when we’re leaving work etc. I think reconnecting on a deeper level once a day could be the difference between a happy and unhappy marriage.

I hope you do find the time! If not for 60 days, at least identifying what you could do in the 10 areas of your life I mentioned above that would make you happier is a start. Once you identify what you could do, it’ll be much easier to implement them!

Same. We chat a bit about the exact things you listed but I think devoting some time to just connecting on a deeper level, would be really helpful for us.

I realized today how little time I make for things I really enjoy.

This comes at a perfect time for me. I will join you, and try to allow myself me time... Guilt free...for 60 days.

#sixtydaychallenge will be a good tool for accountability... Which I need!

Hugs for this!!

Yay! I’m so glad to hear it! I had to look up this quote, but it’s exactly what I’m going for:

Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. - Howard Thurman

This sounds like a great idea! Accountability is the only thing that keeps me on track at the moment. I may join you if I can think of a goal I’d like to achieve. But I will check in with you on your journey nonetheless!

Thank you!! I do hope you join me! It will be an awesome adventure

All right, see you grabbed my interest and my follow. I'll be watching for your updates.

I don't think that any of that sounds selfish. There's a difference between selfish and self full. And there's nothing wrong with being self full. Being as happy and healthy as you can in every area of your life is the only way to live the fullest life possible. I'll be sending out some good vibes for you and I'm excited to watch your progress over the next 60 days.

Thank you! I've already thought twice today "oh, I need to eat my fruit for Steemit" so the accountability part is definitely working!!

Being as happy and healthy as you can in every area of your life is the only way to live the fullest life possible.

You're absolutely right - being as happy and healthy as I can be is the only way to make my cup full so that I can give to others.

Thanks for keeping me honest!