Btw, I've been thinking about the "hay" jackasses and I'm not really good with comebacks, so what do you think of this?

Person 1: Hey
Jackass: Hay is for horses! Aren't you glad you're a jackass!
Person 1: Well, you know what they say about jackasses {wink}.
Jackass: What?
Person 1: You tell me, smartass!!

Or something along those lines. And if they don't take the bait, you can just give that amazing comeback you have at the end of your post (that's probably the best response to jackasses).