Congratulations @groovatti! You have completed the following achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :
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Btw, I've been thinking about the "hay" jackasses and I'm not really good with comebacks, so what do you think of this?
Person 1: Hey
Jackass: Hay is for horses! Aren't you glad you're a jackass!
Person 1: Well, you know what they say about jackasses {wink}.
Jackass: What?
Person 1: You tell me, smartass!!
Or something along those lines. And if they don't take the bait, you can just give that amazing comeback you have at the end of your post (that's probably the best response to jackasses).
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating, this will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied.
Me too and I think homonyms are partially to blame because spellcheck never catches them. Also, my first grade teacher wasn't so good in teaching spelling. I remember if you got a 100% on your weekly spelling bee, the teachers would adhere a cutout apple with your name on it onto a big cutout tree. I clearly recall walking by the other 1st grade classrooms and their spelling trees were loaded with apples, while my class's tree was not.
Another reason is we spell words like they sound which is great if you're Italian because apparently all their words are spelt like they sound. However, English has a lot of words that you can't figure out how to spell by simply "sounding them out" (As my teachers used to always say). It took me ages to figure out how to spell viola and bidet and diarrhea. You can't sound them out! And while we are on the subject, there should be an onomatopoetical word for diarrhea, something like "splatch".
BTW, I had to Google the spelling of "onomatopoetical", now if I can only remember how to spell it :).
Orange you glad to see me?
Oh shit wrong post.
hahahaha
I think you have covered EVERYTHING that could ever be said about homonyms! 😁
Love the Homonym chart ~ such a handy tool!
Congratulations @groovatti! You have completed the following achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :
<p dir="auto"><a href="http://steemitboard.com/@groovatti" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener" title="This link will take you away from hive.blog" class="external_link"><img src="https://images.hive.blog/768x0/https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/votes.png" srcset="https://images.hive.blog/768x0/https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/votes.png 1x, https://images.hive.blog/1536x0/https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/votes.png 2x" /> Award for the number of upvotes <p dir="auto"><sub><em>Click on the badge to view your Board of Honor.<br /> <sub><em>If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word <code>STOP <blockquote> <p dir="auto">Do you like <a href="https://steemit.com/@steemitboard" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener" title="This link will take you away from hive.blog" class="external_link">SteemitBoard's project? Then <strong><a href="https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=steemitboard&approve=1" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener" title="This link will take you away from hive.blog" class="external_link">Vote for its witness and <strong>get one more award!I love this post, @groovatti. Really well done and that buffalo sentence just blows my mind.
Thanks @take5!
Yeah, I still can't wrap my head around that sentence.
Btw, I've been thinking about the "hay" jackasses and I'm not really good with comebacks, so what do you think of this?
Person 1: Hey
Jackass: Hay is for horses! Aren't you glad you're a jackass!
Person 1: Well, you know what they say about jackasses {wink}.
Jackass: What?
Person 1: You tell me, smartass!!
Or something along those lines. And if they don't take the bait, you can just give that amazing comeback you have at the end of your post (that's probably the best response to jackasses).
Ha, I like it!
Hi groovatti,
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating, this will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied.
Judges:
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Thank you to @matytan for the great banner @ComedyOpenMic For Witness And Disrupt The Steem Blockchain With Laughter!
Bye isn’t for people who’d have sexual intercourse with both genders.
Exactly!
I am the world's worst speller. Your article was very detailed and I loved the comebacks.
Me too and I think homonyms are partially to blame because spellcheck never catches them. Also, my first grade teacher wasn't so good in teaching spelling. I remember if you got a 100% on your weekly spelling bee, the teachers would adhere a cutout apple with your name on it onto a big cutout tree. I clearly recall walking by the other 1st grade classrooms and their spelling trees were loaded with apples, while my class's tree was not.
Another reason is we spell words like they sound which is great if you're Italian because apparently all their words are spelt like they sound. However, English has a lot of words that you can't figure out how to spell by simply "sounding them out" (As my teachers used to always say). It took me ages to figure out how to spell viola and bidet and diarrhea. You can't sound them out! And while we are on the subject, there should be an onomatopoetical word for diarrhea, something like "splatch".
BTW, I had to Google the spelling of "onomatopoetical", now if I can only remember how to spell it :).
i just felt like i went through an undergraduate degree in English while sitting at a Comedy club throughout. how is that?
Ha, perhaps all English classes should be taught with a smidgen of humor.
Is not for everyone.
True dat! Mostly for grammatical nerds who aren't easily offended. BTW, have you ever said, "Hay is for horses"?