I have not been friends with my wife for a long time
<p dir="auto">I have been sharing my home with a
<p dir="auto">stranger and its no fault of hers that she
<p dir="auto">also sees me as one.
<pre><code> ***********
<p dir="auto">So getting home that day as usual,
<p dir="auto">my face bereft of friendliness, care or
<p dir="auto">empathy.
<p dir="auto">I walked in to find the house reeking of
<p dir="auto">cleanliness, she was on the sofa at the
<p dir="auto">parlour, legs crossed watching a movie.
<p dir="auto">I walked past her into the bedroom
<p dir="auto">ignoring her greetings.
<p dir="auto">We barely talk, we literally live like two
<p dir="auto">grown ups only leasing an apartment
<p dir="auto">together.
<p dir="auto">I had lost my affection for her,
<p dir="auto">it wasn't something I consciously did,
<p dir="auto">I just could not explain why I feel this
<p dir="auto">utter repugnance each time she's close by
<p dir="auto">me.
<pre><code> *******
<p dir="auto">I was still in the bedroom dressed in just
<p dir="auto">my shorts when she walked in.
<p dir="auto">' Nnam ' she said
<p dir="auto">' here is your food. '
<p dir="auto">I wanted to get angry and rebuke her,
<p dir="auto">but something pushed my attention
<p dir="auto">and I noticed she was dressed in a mini-short and a crop top.
<p dir="auto">She looked beautiful today and hyper
<p dir="auto">glamorous.
<p dir="auto">I hadn't noticed this in weeks.
<p dir="auto">She made to leave and I without thinking
<p dir="auto">stood up and held her hands.
<p dir="auto">And as soon as I touched her I regretted my decision,
<p dir="auto">for my pride nearly enveloped the fires she had rekindled within,
<p dir="auto">but it was too late to let go.
<p dir="auto">I kissed her for the first time in a long time.
<p dir="auto">She didn't hold back but selflessly
<p dir="auto">allowed her lips to hold hands with mine.
<p dir="auto">I made love to her and in the heat of passion,
<p dir="auto">guilt washed all over me and I
<p dir="auto">despairingly regretted everything I had
<p dir="auto">done to this woman.
<pre><code> *******
<ul>
<li><p dir="auto">I had not been a good man and husband.
<li><p dir="auto">I had torn into tiny shreds the heart of
<p dir="auto">the only woman that had ever truly loved
<p dir="auto">me.
<ul>
<li>I had denied her myself and given it
<p dir="auto">instead to ladies who had no regards for
<p dir="auto">marital vows.
<ul>
<li>I had chosen gravels over the diamond
<p dir="auto">that the universe blessed me with.
<pre><code> *********
<p dir="auto">So after we made love on that day,
<p dir="auto">she looked me in the eyes and said 'Thank
<p dir="auto">you '. As she burst into sorrowful sobs.
<p dir="auto">I walked out into the bathroom, locked
<p dir="auto">myself in and cried.
<p dir="auto">I remembered the very first time I saw her,
<p dir="auto">I remembered the sway of her full hips as
<p dir="auto">she walked past me, I remembered the
<p dir="auto">fire in her eyes as I spoke to her,
<p dir="auto">the magic in her smile.
<pre><code> But she didn't have just beauty,
she had soul,
She had a heart as fascinating as
Ronaldo's goal.
<p dir="auto">I had failed as a man, I am ashamed of
<p dir="auto">myself and sorrow has occupied a room in
<p dir="auto">my soul.
<p dir="auto">Do I go left where there's nothing right?
<p dir="auto">OR
<p dir="auto">Do I turn right where there's nothing left?
<pre><code> Akudo (my wealth of honour),
<p dir="auto">You have every reason to want to walk
<p dir="auto">away, every reason to not look back on
<p dir="auto">the vows we shared.
<p dir="auto">But before you leave even if you will,
<pre><code> ***Please forgive me***
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