You know what would be good for relationships? If everyone that ended included an exit interview. Just imagine how productive it could be for everyone to clarify their thoughts and feelings about where things went wrong, and what to do differently in the next relationship. Here are few issues so hotly debated in today’s society as the roles of men and women toward each other and in society. The arguments range all the way from those who maintain that man is created to rule and woman to serve, to those who maintain that there are no significant differences between men and women besides the physical differences required for human reproduction. In other words, we humans are mightily confused about the roles of women and men! When men and women end their relationships, most of their interviews would boil down to one common denominator: My partner didn’t understand and respond to my most important needs. The feedback would sound something like this: “She didn’t give me enough [insert need]” or “He didn’t care about the fact that I [insert need].” In relationships, people often get so busy trying to get their own needs met that they forget about the unique needs their partners have, too.
Never is the issue of unique needs more relevant than when understanding the differences between men and women. At root, men and women have the same basic needs: to be noticed, to be loved, and to have a purpose in the relationship. Yet it’s how men and women go about getting those needs met that bears the crucial differences. These roles of men and women toward each other and in society have been consistent enough throughout enough of history that they may seem to have been ordained by God from the beginning.
If a man works on himself and develops himself to be worthy, the woman will be his partner. If he doesn't, she will be against him.
If a man wants to be seen as worthy and have a good relationship with a woman, he has to show leadership. When he sees a situation that needs to be dealt with, he should step forward and handle it. People admire those who step forward to handle difficult situations. We don't admire those who stand back and wait for others to solve the problem.
Some men avoid taking the lead because they don't want to be criticized. They think they're playing it safe. A man should say, "I'll handle it," and take the initiative to find solutions. If he's not sure what the solution is, do what other leaders do -- consult the many sources of information available.
• A man who grew up in a home where the mother was the domestic manager, taking care of cooking, washing & basic needs, might well be attracted to similar types of female who were taught to be that way by their mothers.
THE WOMAN
What women think men want from them often causes women to have resentment and anger toward men, and feel hopeless about ever developing a wonderful, warm, romantic partnership?
A woman has high expectations for you, because she has them for herself. She wouldn’t ask something of you that she wasn’t ready to do, and though she knows that a good relationship means being able to support each other, she knows that doesn’t just go one way. There may be times when she needs your help, but it’s more important to her that you know that you could ask for the same, anytime. She wants to be the shoulder you can cry on, half of the team, and bring her own independence to be able to create something stronger between you. She doesn’t expect everything to be handed to her, because she knows everything will be better if it’s built by two. It is required of the woman to deal with a man in direct, straight communication. It takes about three months of this habit to take to the style. No claim, no blame – that is the art of a woman. The science of the woman is” always keep the spirit going. The art of a woman is: never claim anything and you will never get blamed for anything. If you want to live rich and be taken care of, do not claim anything.
If a man relates to a woman, he cannot see her as ugly, because nobody can feel the flow of bad things. Most men want acknowledgment and appreciation from women. Learning to acknowledge instead of making your partner wrong is one of the most powerful relationship survival tools available to you.