My Crush And I

Episode one
The Intro

Oh wow! You’re reading my blog.

First, I’d love to apologize for not making this post on Wednesday as promised in my previous post. Life happened, and I won’t bore you with the details.

Just this once, can we pretend Monday is Wednesday? 🥹

Welcome to today’s episode of (drum roll please 🥁) MY CRUSH AND I!

So, before we dive deeper and savor into the juiciness of this story, “My Crush and I”, I figured it’s only right for you to get to know me better. I mean, if we’re going to be hanging out like this every Wednesdays for the next couple of weeks, it seems fair for you to learn about this storyteller and all that revolves around me and my interactions with people.

I’m a blend of introversion and extroversion, meaning I thrive in social settings but also need my quiet time. I can be the quiet person sitting in a corner, quietly observing the room, taking mental notes and figuring out how I fit into the vibe (a typical “Here” by Alessia Cara moment). Other times, I love engaging conversations - we share stories, thoughts, ideas, memories, life, laughter, go on adventures and create new memories together, throwing caution in the wind, (a typical “Marry you” by Bruno Mars)

People’s first impressions about me aren’t always nice, and I’ve gotten used to it whenever I meet someone new. In fact, I always look forward to hearing what they have to say. Some have said I wear a frown 24/7, some said I’ve got a permanent scowl on my face. I’ve been called rude, antisocial, critic, and all the other mean words you can think of. On the flip side, some have described me as an easy-going person, jovial, etc. These opinions come out, until I show them the other side of me. There are people who’ll never know I smile, and others who’ll never believe I get angry. The impression you get from me on our first meeting depends on many factors: where we are, what we’re meeting for, who introduced us, how we met, why we met, who you’re with, maybe my mood at the time, etc. Besides, I try to avoid “see finish” from people.

When I meet someone for the first time, male or female, the first thing I notice is the way they walk, (assuming I get there first, which is rare), and the aura they bring. I mean, I’m big on confidence - the way you speak, your gestures, etc. I’m not one to judge people’s outfits or hair, be it cheap or expensive; as long as your style/appearance are on point, we’re good. I tend to notice things others might overlook - like your toenails and ears (if they’re clean, you got me). Then there’s your dentition, smile, voice and oh boy the lips! If I’m not feeling those, then naaah, I’m out. I’ve also got certain physical features I’m drawn to which I won’t mention, (a girl’s got to have secrets- duh! Believe me, it’s not the six packs and all). I also vibe with people who play instruments and sing. I pay attention to the way you treat people around, the people you walk with, how you act, body language, etc. Oh yes! I notice things. If we’re going to be seen together, it has to be worth it. Overall, if I’m feeling you, my brain starts overthinking how best to converse with you and sometimes, it gets a bit awkward.

Now, I’m very expressive. I do not need third parties unless absolutely necessary. You know those movie scenes where someone approaches someone on behalf of someone else? Yeah, that’s not me. If I want something/someone, I go for it. The worst that could happen is getting rejected. If I can’t approach you directly, I’ll get you to notice me - one way or the other. But then, if I like someone, I get shy. You know those “oh my God, he’s sitting close to me, “he shook my hand” moments you see in movies? Yup, that’s real life for me. Hard girl in the mud. Although, I do hide it.

When it comes to conversations, I already mentioned I’m an over thinker. I just want everything to go smoothly, and if anything goes wrong, I’d prefer it’s not from my end. I’m expressive, but I also hate hurting people’s feelings. If I’m not feeling you, the date or environment, I’ll suck it up, especially if you’re happy or feel embarrassed or something off. But if you’ve got that pompous vibe, trust me, my scowl is ever ready. I once went on a date with a guy who enjoyed silence, (a typical Lord John Stirling in Bridgerton), I found it awkward, but since it made him feel peaceful, I adapted. Now, talking in person is much easier for me cause I can read your expressions, figure out if I should change topic or not, etc. But chatting online? Oh boy! You know how people can be so unreal when chatting, my brain goes into overdrive. If you send me a “lmao” emoji, I’ll start wondering if you’re actually laughing hard or just sitting there with a straight face. Also, You’ll rarely catch me messaging people first - fear of overdoing it or messaging them at a wrong time.

Anyhow. This is just the tip of an iceberg. As we continue with “My Crush And I”, you’ll get to know more. So, stick around and who knows - you might just relate to some moments. Keep an eye out for the next episode - it’s going to be fun (fingers crossed).

Oh! And again, I’m sorry for missing last Wednesday as promised. Let’s just call today a “special edition” the press forgot to print.

See you on Wednesday.

#MycrushandI #series

All images are mine, except otherwise stated.