Parent's Special Love: Our Journey on the Spectrum

MOTHERHOOD

Very big word right? At the age of 24 I became a mother. Throughout the journey, there were lot of realizations. Questions like... Am I gonna be a good mother? Can we provide his needs? How to become a good parents? It was mix of emotions, doubts, hopes and dreams for the future of our child was our first thought when we started the journey.

The Beginning...

When I gave birth to my son, Kurt Liam on April 2018, it was beautiful, messy, and humbling journey. True enough that a mother's unwavering love for her child is unbeatable. From sleepless nights, breastfeeding, endless diaper changing ,singing lullabies and of course there were countless moments of joy, and tears that shape us as a "Mama" .

Challenge during Covid-19 Pandemic

Not until the year 2020-2021 was declared pandemic due to Covid-19 virus outbreak. Kurt Liam turned 2 years old that time, we had simple celebration at home and did some DIY decoration as you can see in the picture (by the way I also like doing DIY decorations 😅). I don't see anything suspicious about his development, just a normal baby. We adored his cuteness so much.

(Kurt Liam's 2nd Birthday)

Fast forward. Then, he turned 3 years old, time flies very fast. This was the time I felt that there was something wrong with his development. We thought it was normal on his age since he was just 3. Some of our family member said "nah just give him time, he's just 3. Let's wait until 4 he will talk just like normal kids."

But I was hesitant, I have this feeling that he might be autistic because of the signs that I observed. Signs like there was minimal eye contact,can't even say "Mama" or "Papa",no response when we call his name and has difficulty in imitating sounds or words, hand flapping, speech delayed, and often mumbled his words .When he wants something, he will just lead your hand to get the object that he wants. Can't even express if he was happy or sad, or hungry or thirsty. Since we cannot go to the malls, playgrounds because of the pandemic, we tried our best to let him enjoy even for a short time. These were
some of his favorite during pandemic, going on the beach and neverending running in the open field 😅.

The Diagnosis

At 3 years old and 5 months we visited the Developmental Pedia (DevPed) to consult and assess on my son's development. Me and my husband were so nervous, we knew already what would be the result.
But at first, we were in denial stage. There were many questions that popped out in our minds. Where did we go wrong? How did this happen? 🥺 At first, we can't accept the fact that our son has ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder). It was very hard, we don't know how to start. But instead questioning, we asked God for guidance and strength to surpass this challenge.
This journey taught us a whole new level of patience, understanding, and resilience.

Early Intervention Works ✨

Kurt's socialization, appropriate behavior, and communication skills were enhanced by participating in occupational therapy (OT) playgroups and exposing him to other kids. Additionally, enrolling him in school at age five was also helpful. The fact that he started kindergarten was also very beneficial to his progress. We were so grateful seeing his improvement. Although not yet in a complete sentence, at least he can express what he wants like "Mama, water please" "Happy Liam" and more. He can now identify things around him. Everytime we go out we always narrate where we were going and what we were doing. And even at home we trained him to do some basic household chores in order to keep him busy.

There is no better feeling for a parent than hearing their child speak their first words after months of intensive therapy and mastering a new skill that aligns perfectly with their special interest. Each achievement is a celebration. These are the moments that mark personal growth but also reflect the support of my family,teachers, and therapists that gave their unwavering support.

(Some activities that interests him especially painting the Philippine Flag 😅)

Redefining Patience:

Remember when you thought you were patient? Motherhood can test those limits. Especially having an autistic child or shall we say "Ausome" child. There were meltdowns especially when they feel overwhelmed and find it very hard to calm themselves. Changes in routine, sudden loud noises like tricycle, having videoke in special occasions and more.

As parents, we tried our best to cope up with his meltdowns with the the support of our family, teachers, and professional advice of therapist.

Up until now, our favorite weekend activity has been visiting the therapy center for his OT.
Given that classes will resume soon it is best to keep him busy and continue learning.

Alongside with continuous therapy, financial challenge was there due to the high cost of therapy. My husband and I are always positive about overcoming this situation. With high hopes, I know soon we will tell the world that we made it!
I know God will not give us this challenge that we can't solve.

(This was during their closing ceremony. Finally, finished Kindergarten-1🥳)

This changed our outlook in life as a parent where the little things are never little, where the smallest milestones are celebrated and we are so thankful for the progress that our son has possessed. There were tough days but seeing things positively is our huge strength as a family.

Let me end my blog by leaving this quotes:

"Sometimes the things that make us different are the things that make us strong" -Unknown

I am not an expert mom, but I am willing to share ideas and advice with someone who has been on the same journey as me.

Always remember, you are never alone on this journey. You are doing great mama and papa!

Thank you so much for reading 🫶 Until next update!