I really need to go sub you on YouTube @jerrybanfield. I'm DarthShadie on there.

Regarding the victimisation, I used to be like that too. I live with PTSD and it was so easy for me to just blame the guy who abused me for every single little thing that went wrong in my life. I got all these ailments and I was stuck.

The day I decided I would change my life around, I met my husband, I started healing, even if it got worse before it could get better, I found happiness. When I tell people that I healed depression, they look at me like I committed a crime. How dare I heal depression, without medication on top of that, how can I find happiness, while still living with some of the ailments I have. How can I have a burnout and still be happy and do things that I love to do, how can I work from home and sleep when I want and write all night and be the creative person I am.

By the way, I LOVE the Eminem rapping all random there. I'm a huge fan of the guy.

I meet with friends who are mothers and they complain about all the responsibilities they have. I talk about my step-kids, my closest friends aren't like this but other people dismiss it, it's not real motherhood according to them. I don't have my own kids yet, I haven't gone through a pregnancy and how painful it can be. Well, my mother and both grandmothers had excellent births and my mother felt no pain at all, barely was in labour and claims it was even orgasmic. So I highly doubt that giving birth to my future child (whenever that may be) will be a bad experience.

It's a competition of who is worse off, who has it the worst. Well, I'll tell you something, I once had it bad, so bad I wanted to self harm, so bad I felt disgusted with myself, ashamed of myself, and it made me realise that I did NOT want to be there, in the victim mode. I got out of there, unprogrammed myself from all that narcissistic bs brainwashing, still healing, still reprogramming my mind, and I am happy. And people think I've changed too. But I'm happy. They'Re not happy to see me happy and those people, are no longer in my life. The people I surround myself with are happy to see me happy.

The society is programmed in such a way that happiness is viewed as a priviledge and if you are happy, you are undeserving. Well you know what, we are all deserving of happiness and poopoo on those other people who try to put us down for finding meaning in our lives. They are so unhappy and seem so unwilling to work on themselves to get themselves where they want to be. Some of them will do it, and be happy some day too. Others will remain where they are. It's not our problem. It's not our fault. We need to focus on our happiness and hopefully that will inspire others to focus on theirs and to find it as we have.