Two Worst Enemies: How Betrayal Shaped My Path to Happiness

Is it possible to have two worst enemies? Even if you say I can't, I'm going to say I can. My two worst enemies, though I'm not even sure if I should call them that, are just two people who drastically altered the course of my life. Their influence shaped my decisions about education, the friendships that became lifelong, and even how I viewed myself overall.

I ran cross country in middle school, high school, and college. During middle and high school, my teams felt like family, they were a huge part of what kept me going through those years with high spirits. But college was different; it was divided into three groups. We had the partygoers who were just there for the ride, the top runners who were among the best in the nation, and then there were guys like me, not the greatest (okay I was average), but incredibly dedicated.

In my first two years of college, I struggled to find a group where I truly fit in. I had my teammates, and they were cool, but I went to a party school, and partying just wasn’t my thing. I didn’t drink or get involved in any of that. I was the kid who kept my nose clean, my head down, and focused on running and academics.

Going into my junior year, I hit it off with a girl on my team. Before long, we started dating. At first, things seemed okay, though she didn't want anyone to know about us initially, which might have been a red flag, but I didn’t think much of it at the time. After a few months, she finally decided it was okay for people to know, and soon her teammates, friends, and family were in the loop. For the next year or so, things went relatively smoothly.

But around this time, things started to go downhill. There was more arguing, less communication, and an overall sense that things had soured. Neither of us seemed fully happy, and she grew increasingly distant.

These things happen, people get into relationships, they grow apart, and that's part of being young. It sucked, but I didn’t think much of it at the time. However, that wasn’t the whole story. I had a teammate and roommate who I considered one of my closest friends while I was there.

One day at a team party, yeah, I know I said I didn’t party, but I’d make an exception for team events, especially after I turned 21, I had both of them pulling me aside at different times, each claiming the other had made a move on them. And honestly, to this day, I have no idea who was telling the truth, who was lying, or if they were both just full of it. They'd both been drinking, and some people like to say, 'Oh, it’s just the alcohol talking.' To that, I say, screw that, alcohol is not an excuse.

I broke up with her the next morning. I didn’t know who was right or wrong the night before, but things were already falling apart, and this was just the cherry on top. As for my so-called friend, I kept my distance because I didn’t know what to believe. What really sealed the deal was when other teammates told me they’d seen the two of them hanging out together not long after everything went down, just the two of them. That pretty much told me all I needed to know: neither of them cared, and they were both full of it.

To say the next 6 to 8 months sucked would be an understatement. I hated going to practice because I had to see them both every day. We practiced six days a week, traveled to meets together, and stayed in hotels together, there was no escaping them unless I quit the team, which I wasn’t about to do. Oddly enough, I had some of my best races that year, probably because I poured everything into running. My academics, on the other hand, took a backseat. I think I passed my classes, but my GPA definitely took a hit.

But in the end, I managed to get my act together. I decided to go to graduate school because, well, all my previous plans had pretty much gone up in flames. In grad school, I actually started having a life, hitting the rec center, playing basketball, going out a being social and, you know, actually enjoying my classes. I made a bunch of really close friends there, and after 14 or 15 years, we're still tight. I even met my wife through one of those grad school buddies, and we've been happily married for almost 10 years now... okay, fine, it's only been eight, but who's counting? It's been awesome!

So yeah, I’d say my ex-girlfriend and my ex-roommate/buddy from college definitely make the cut as my worst enemies. Honestly, I didn’t have many enemies, I got along with most people, so having two people stab me in the back? That’s enemy territory right there. Why all this went down, I have no idea. Maybe it was my fault, maybe it wasn’t, but at this point, who cares? There’s no use dwelling on it. My life ended up in a better place, and honestly, a big part of that is thanks to them. So, to my two best enemies, thanks for everything

In closing, I want to acknowledge my enemies and say that both of you played a significant role in my life for about two years. Those years, despite the challenges, were largely positive and helped me navigate other aspects of college. I also want to thank you for the pain you caused me; it ultimately focused me on my true goals and led me to meet lifelong friends, including my wife, and to have the two amazing kids I have today.