War in Ukraine. 14 Days of Our Struggle for Freedom and Independence

"To be or not to be is not a question of compromise. Either you be or you don't be." Golda Meir

I started a new post. And I will begin it from a terrible news. I want ALL WORLD TO KNOW.

The Ukrainian city of Mariupol has been under blockade for 4 days. The city is holding on. But there are also civilians, not only military, the occupiers do not let them out of their town! They have no water, electricity, heat or communication. This is a HUMANITARIAN CATASTROPHE. The humanitarian convoy for Mariupol came under fire from BM-21 Grad and cannot continue to move. A 6-year-old girl died of dehydration yesterday after being found next to her mother, who was killed by a Russian shell.

Does anyone suppose this can be forgiven??

I want to weep with all my heart. But I have to hang on and stay strong. I know I will let my tears flow, but let it be tears of happiness.

• My night was more less quiet. I slept in my bed, despite of 2 air raids. Nick didn't call since yesterday morning. Hope it's just because of poor communication.

• My shift starts today, and girls wrote me yesterday, they miss me! And I miss them all. 🤗

• I talked to Nick finally. He slept in a sleeping bag under the open sky. In winter, -4 C. He sounds cheerful, although has no helmet and bullet-proof vest. They received some, but not enough. 💔 I miss him so much. Next night will be -7 C. 😳

• This seems to be the most challenging day to me. I am sad and broken, feel like crying all the time. My friends try to cheer me up, or feed or make a tea. But all their care just make me want to cry. I don't know what to do. Talk to a friend could help, but this is a kind of things I am not supposed to share, so ... I will try to keep it inside and cope with. Hope to feel better tomorrow.

What day and date is it today? - I ask my calendar every morning.

10 March

• 8:30 am. Thank you, AF of Ukraine for today's morning. Girls that spent the night at the first floor said it was the most scary and loud night. I slept one floor below with earplug in, and didn't hear.

• Volunteers get settled here. They brought hand cream, girls are having breakfast with with eye patches. This is acceptance. But for me, all that's going on I don't want it to become a part if my life.

• Ukrainian and foreign reporters arrived, with cameras. I heard Spanish, English and French. My shift was over, but one girl fell ill and did not come. So I stayed to help warm up the food for delivery to our soldiers. Our girls are very strong. They smiled and gave interviews. I just tried not to cry.

• I am at home now. Talked to Nat. Nick also called several times today, but because the bad connection I could barely hear him. I think about Nick all the time. Our "volunteer general" said: "Go home and rest. We need you." I drove to bring water, full SUV of water. And then went home. Hope I will sleep today. And tomorrow will be another day.

11 March

• Today in the morning my hometown and two other cities where hit by an air strike. Nat went down to the basement at night. She and mom are fine. 🙏 Nick has called, he is okay, but I suspect that "okay" has changed its meaning...

• 12 am. I saw Nick for one short minute. I could not believe my eyes. He said he's beeing taken to hospital. I gave him a hug and was only gone for a few seconds, when returned he's left. I thought "hospital" means our medical compartment here in the volunteering center, but looks like it's really hospital. 😳