Quality of Life or Quantity of Life?

in #life6 years ago

When we read this our instant reaction is for sure Quality of Life, but I have come across people who have a zest to live no matter whatever the condition. In such cases I really question myself does the quality of life means nothing to such people and what must be the reason to this. Why would someone be so attached to the thought of living a long life no matter what the condition is. Is it the hope of recovery or is it the attachment to materialistic world or is it they are waiting for something to happen and then give up, or is it just the positive attitude towards life and accepting what is coming on the way, or is it the fear of death?

I still can't figure out, but I have seen all of this in different people because of which they still long for a lengthy life. Some of my very close family members I have seen them not giving up so easily.
My Grandmother, she passed away at 86. She had Parkinson, Diabetes, and was very little mobile but I never heard her complaining about life or telling us that she does not like the type of life she has. She would burn her hands while cooking due to Parkinson but still she would not want to take help and do everything independently. She would have a fall and she would still next day attempt to do the same things. A lot of will power, at the end of the day I would think if I would be in her place I would wish to die but I never heard her ever being dejected and giving up.


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Then was my Mother-in-law. She had kidney failure and on Dialysis, she had diabetes, thyroid, Heart issues and many other problems, but she had some very strong attachment to life and wanted to live a long life.
Last year of her life was on and off in hospital and there was so much happening to her body, we were all feeling sad and sorry for her, but I never saw her giving up. She was very close to us so we could understand her thoughts. She had this hope that she would recover completely and get back to her normal routines, whereas the reality was she was never going to be ok, which was not sinking into her. She was on Dialysis every alternate day and slumping down by the day, which we could all see very clearly but she never accepted. There was a time once when even the doctors gave up and told us we will not put her on any external support, In 2 days time she was back again and wanted to go home making plans for future. This whole incident was beyond my thinking capability. Was it something happening at a higher level or was it just her zest for life. It finally came to a stage where her body skin started peeling off and then that was the time when she gave up and then she passed away. I could clearly see that the time she gave up, she made an exit. So it made me wonder all the more that can we hold on to our death?.

Then there are these other set of people whose belief is let me do whatever I like, live my life to the fullest not by doing the right things but by doing all the wrong things. They would say let me eat and do all that I like no matter what harm it brings to my body. I feel like hitting hard to such people for being so irresponsible. They do not realize that every illness does not lead to death, many will lead to long time suffering and with that it's not only a problem for you but you are pulling down all those in the thread with you.


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Coming across many such people who have been so so attached to life in the worst of their health situation but never wanting to still give up really keeps me amazed as to what is it that makes them still continue. I can understand Life and Death is not in our hands and one will pass on in their right time. But my curiosity is with the people who in the worst conditions also still want to live. What matters to them the Quality of Life or Quantity of Life or is it the fear of Death the fear of the unknown.

Yes this also can be one of the reasons, the fear of death. I have spent a lot of my life time in hospitals. First with my Father who was for years suffering with his ailments, then mother in law who was almost similar and my other aged family members. during my times in hospitals talking to other people and doctors I have also seen this that people fear death and hence they just cannot let go off themselves from their physical body. Though I believe that death is not in our control but the fear of death may also hold up a person.

I personally feel that one should not shy off talking about death to their dear ones if they are at a critical stage. Sometimes they need that ease off in the passing stage. Doing those talks and make them feel safe about the whole transition will help them smoothly pass off with a gentle frame of mind.

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Interesting topic!

Thank you

"Die young as late as possible", I will never forget that phrase. Reminds me every day that we should live as best we can.

That's what I too believe in.

Quality is how good we help each other, quantity is how well you live your life.
What do you think?

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True, but quality is also the quality of life that we live. Are we happy, healthy, everything matters a holistic approach

Your perception is kind of good too.

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The moment we are born we are dying. Fear of death is needed to kick in our survival instincts but in the old age people make peace with death.

Ohh rather I am seeing opposite these days, Old people get more flury when this topic comes up

The question is how old people. Old old people or just old people. Old people up to 75 years for sure did not make peace with death, but everyone who is closer to 100 made the peace. If the 100 year old person is sane you can hear real wisdom coming from his mouth.

Well debated medical dilemma as well.
I think Fear of death and will to live play their parts. Survival is a basic animal instinct.
When a person gives up due to psychological reasons it is not the same as for physical reasons although both parties are having terrible quality of life.
Euthanasia might sound appropriate in physical conditions but never in psychological conditions and is considered as a murder in the latter.
I think it is the hope that drives people to live and battle that they have few more quality moments in their extended life.

I hope this made sense :)

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That's very well said @moghul, Survival the basic instinct exist within all of us. That's true hope is something that keeps them going but a hopeless hope is so painful is what I feel all the time.

That’s very true

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people who always imagine death, soul, mind, behavior is always good for other people, writing is very useful, @nainaztengra. 😊

Thank you for sharing your thougts @jhoni

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Not the easiest of topics to speak of, but you are right. People need to accept we are mortal beings.

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Thank you for your thoughts 💚

I don't think.we are adequately taught to accept death and aging as we should, so death can be terrifying for most of us. And I'd say the bodies inbuilt survival system is pretty strong...

When I asked Dad if he'd go through that awful chemo again he said yes, because he is too young to die. He is 71. I'm not ready to see him die either!

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Yes it is too difficult to part with our loved one and we keep hoping there is a reversal for them. It was the same with my dad, but when he passed into coma, I wished for his exit because by then we knew there was no coming back and if there would be he would be in vegetable state. It is a difficult part of life and we have to face it.

Nice topic. I think honestly that most folks can't stand the idea of disability, and therefore delude themselves endlessly until it happens to them. Honestly, think of it: You've had an entire life of self-autonomy, and now you're stuck in a frail body and needed assistance (permission) from others. That's got to be a terrible shock, especially when you consider that it's not going to change. But there is a death-positivity movement currently, of funeral homes dedicated to decency rather than profit. Here's a link, its very interesting...

The Order of the Good Death

Death is transition to a better place is what I believe, a much better place then where we are living physically. Yes parting with the bonding that we have built up in the life times is a difficult thing.
I am going through the link, it is really interesting to read the different experiences. Thank you for sharing

If possible I prefer both quantity and quality of life.
If its not possible, it depends on the giver and taker of life.
If I'm forced to choose, I'll pick quality of life because I believe in life after death.

Same here, I too believe that death is just a transition from one plane to another.

Yeah.
So we're lucky we believe in life after death because we no longer fear pain, sickness and death.

Some people have higher tolerance for pain so I guess this holding onto Life is a result of that

Thanks for sharing @nainaztengra. Great post

True, and I get amazed with their tolerance level.

My mom's 89 and post stroke...but even when so unwell, she wanted to live. I don't think it's the fear of death but rather she wants to still with us. With a 1 -yr old and a week old babies in the house, she cant speak nor move, but she smiles and kisses them when she sees them. For me that is quality with what she's able. Her strength is back but very dependent.

The bonding that we have built up keeps it going and gives all the courage I guess.

Most probably..with you saying that, we have had a patient who couldn't wait to die. Like she looked at me for even bothering to help her out. A psyhic colleague mentioned that when she passed over, she left without lookin back.

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Survival instinct is natural and so is the fear of unknown to some extent. It does make it easier to live with the acceptance that this life form will die, no one survived life yet. Whatever approach you take, whatever spiritual path you follow and even if you do not have one, it is not rational to fear death but then again, we are not always rational, are we? :)
This was a lovely read, thank you for sharing your thought about this subject 💚

That's a good insight Petra, thank you for sharing your thoughts 💖


I just see this life as a training ground for a better life ahead which is the afterlife.Life is still beautiful and enjoyable despite the obstacles, those same obstacles does makes us strong @nainaztengra

Yes my friend, we are all the time learning be it through pleasant or unpleasant situations.

I'd go with QUALITY. One life will be enough if lived well. :)