Of Leaving, coming back, going out, returning and so on - Thoughts from a garden

I'm writing this post with this little view, pretty comfortable and sunny if you ask me, I can't and won't complain.

Been a while. I can't count how many times I've written a post like the one I'm trying to put together right now. I've lacked nspiration and drive to write on Hive for the past year, almost exactly one year ago, when the whole Hive/Steem bananas went down. I lost motivation to be active on and with the community not just because of the whole change that we all went through together, but also because a lot of people showed their true colors and took of their masks, particularly common users who showed they only care about the money and not the community as a whole, and whales or influential people who made using Steem, DTube or any other decentralized social media sort of a capital sin, where if you are active on Hive and any other non-hive app, you're practically a traitor to the cause. I mean, I get it, at some point I thought like that but, I can't help to wonder how many regular users we lost by demanding Hive users post Hive-exclusive content or else we just ignore them, and at times, even downvote them to discourage such behaviour.

This is just an example I came up with while writing this, I'm not speaking about any specific user and this is not an attack to those who think one way or another, it's just my attempt at explaining why my motivation faltered. It was because of attitudes like the one I mention and some others. There's no one to blame, the community behaves as a hive mind and it is the free app market that makes the rules, not just a couple of users.

I've been trying to get back at Hive, posting, commenting and engaging with the community, or whatever is left of the community I once knew - there's probably a whole different community now, hopefully, because that would mean the user attraction strategies have been working so far - but, probably this will be my only post of the week, who knows, perhaps I end up writing daily for a week and then stop for a while, or maybe I'll be able to write 3-4 times a week for a year... Since my involvement in Hive stopped being my job, I realized I was no longer Hiveing for fun, but because I had to. Coming to this realization allowed me to make the decision that I would not come back definitely, until I opened my laptop and began writing for fun, writing to practice my narration skills, writing to be the nomad that back when Steem was only a year old, was posting amazing content because he loved to and because he wanted to share with his audience.

I think I'm that person now, or at least I'm sufficiently enough at peace with me, the community, the coin and the blockchain, to feel like I want to - and not have to - engage with the amazing people that hopefully are still part of our little internet corner.

I'm not really sure why I'm making this post. I'm writing this piece, most likely, as an explanation for myself, trying to figure out why did I felt like that for a year, and why I just couldn't make myself open the laptop and share thought, opinions and experiences on chain. It is not an explanation for you, dear reader, not an explanation in the form of an excuse, but more of a "honor where honor is due", and I owe those of you who kept sharing, engaging and making this blockchain a better one, I owe you guys a "letter of openness".

I hope to be seeing you and the many new users that may come, day after day, building this blockchain, no matter if we do it as users, developers, investors or content consumers.

I hope you have a great weekend, I know I will, or at least I will try to, which is enough, more than enough.