Right or wrong, I push myself harder than I probably should in the pursuit of positive results; it's always been that way. I want to do things well and better than they were done before.
Perfection doesn't exist, but the continual-improvement paradigm does and that's what I seek as results and in myself personally. I take ownership, show responsibility and discipline and drive myself harder than any one else could and its worked well despite taking a toll on my emotional, physical and mental state of being...and that's a slippery slope if not taken care of.
I need to embrace and apply concepts that keep me in good shape
Fortunately, just as I understand the concepts, systems and procedures that lead me to greater results, I understand that I need to embrace and apply concepts that keep me in good shape in those three areas above; without them being in good shape a person doesn't really have much to work with and goals are more difficult to reach.
Throughout my professional career(s) I've mostly been in leadership roles of some sort be it at the the pointy end or the middle area.
No matter the position though, leadership is the same thing and I've tended to lead by example. I've never asked my teams/team members to do things I haven't done myself, or that which I wouldn't do, and I've personally maintained good attitudes and effort even in times when I might not have felt like it. I have worked harder than the team, slept less, carried more, trained harder, planned more diligently, taken on more responsibility, accepted the liability so they didn't have to and generally demonstrated the willingness to support them at all costs, even my own.
A person simply can't run at one hundred percent without pausing for rest, recharge, relaxation.
Naturally, going to those lengths wears a person down and despite thriving on the action and activity, little by little the energy drains away...this, even despite the thoughts and attitudes being in the right place. It's unavoidable; a person simply can't run at one hundred percent without pausing for rest, recharge, relaxation...whatever you want to call it. One must detach, find a gap and reset.
I've had one of those days weeks months at work.
I'm closing in on the end of my annual budget year and despite my results being ok, they're not as good as I would like, and so I've been burning the candle at both ends.
During the day I've been at work having meetings with clients and internally, making calls, writing emails and working on pricing. In the evenings I've been researching, completing proposals and other documentation and doing my administrative work on my client relationship management (CRM) software. I don't count the hours, but I've been sleeping less and taking less care of myself emotionally, physically and mentally and...it's fucken bonkers.
Driving myself so carelessly hasn't worked out so well
I'm always banging on about the importance of rest and relaxation, recovering from stress and pressure and the relentless operational tempo I've put myself and teams under; they did what they did because I enforced a detach and rest policy. I applied it to myself also, to good effect, but lately I've completely ignored it and have paid a price. I'll not go into it, but driving myself so carelessly hasn't worked out so well for me and over the last few days I've had a rethink and made some really good decisions to help mitigate the fallout and prevent myself getting into this situation again.
I like focus and have the ability to be intensely focused upon things which has brought great results, but there's a line once can cross and it's often unhealthy to do so. Our minds and bodies are a good measure of where that line is; for some the line is a little more distant than for others but it always exists. To step over it and push on may seem productive, but it's often going to end badly without some other factors and elements coming in to play. Over that line is where burnout lies and burnout isn't productive.
In the last few days I realised I was over the line and that caused me to stop and think.
My think-break lasted a day or so and I came back with a brand new plan, one I'm familiar with but had allowed to sit on the bottom of the to-do-list for far too long. Just that thought, the understanding around the concept of taking care of myself, made me feel better, a little lighter, and I got back into things with renewed energy.
No human being can drive at a thing in a completely straight line, no matter how hard they try. We can move in the right general direction though, and despite getting off course now and then, getting wobbly, a little bump or nudge and we're back heading towards the goal. I guess the key is to realise when that bump is required and what form the bump takes...The detachment, rest and relaxation.
I think it's all about balance
If we drive at something with relentless focus, we need to balance that out with a detachment, rest and relaxation of the mind, body and soul. It's something I have instilled in my teams and have actively enforced...sometimes I forget my own rules though, for a time at least.
What have your experiences been with focus and driving towards a goal? How is it you sustain momentum, the right thoughts and attitudes and, more importantly, how do you monitor yourself and recognise that it's time to detach and find a centre-point so you can push on harder once again? How do you know when to feed your emotional and mental needs and to work on your physical needs, and how do you do it? Feel free to comment below, I'm really interested in what works for you, and what hasn't.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default; tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind - galenkp
[All original and proudly AI free.]
Any images in this post are my own.
I also push myself to my limit but I still leave a little strength so that I can still go up to have a little rest. Doing things with a perfect result in mind will only make me crazy so I just do it moderately. No need to push myself too hard because I know it will really take a toll on my body and that's the least that I want to happen. It's not enjoyable anymore if there's pressure. And sometimes, getting to hard will only lead to destruction. So I do it on my own pace, just the way I want it to be. With proper rest, eat properly and always on time then after that, I will continue what I'm doing and no pressure. Just go have fun while working hard.
For those who want to achieve, it's necessary to apply effort, focus, determination and persistence, but balance is required.
This is true and why I replaced the pursuit of perfection to the pursuit of continuous improvement.
I understand what you mean about doing things at your own pace etc. Although, sometimes that's not possible and so pressure ensues. That's why we need to learn how to find that detachment, because pressure and stress is inevitable.
Imagine a soldier in combat. Doing things at his own pace and stress free may get him and others killed. So, there's pressure...But, back at base, after action, there's a release. A detachment in some way. Some play video games, call home, sleep, read, push weights, clean things, stand in in the shower, listen to heavy metal music or whatever...That's them finding detachment and balance.
Fortunately most will never be in that situation, but the workplace offers stresses and pressure that is sometimes unavoidable and that's what this post is about; the ability to see them, read the signs from one's own body and mind, and to mitgate them.
Thanks for your great comment.
In life, when we In persuit of achieving a good result at what we do, we do make sacrifices achieve success and at times it's inevitable, we can only make adjustment.
Most times I do prevent myself from overloading myself from work, but most time , When looking at the things that that I have left undone, I cannot but finish it up even it will take away sleep for me. I have been fight hard to put a balance to it because during those times.my mood and even relationship with others is affected because of not enough rest and sleep
Setting a balance is the only way out, What I do mostly Is to have a good rest during holidays and during those moments, I try as much as possible to do away with things that disturb me from resting. I feel much better and even have a time for meditation.
Being unbalanced in a work/life situation will often effect many areas as you have alluded to. I'm of the opinion that a person should be 100% focused on the task at hand. When at work, it's work. When at play, then it's that. It's called presence. We must be present in the moments of our life lest those moments are not used effectively.
In a family like mine where you constantly feel the need to prove yourself, to be the best, I've pushed myself almost to the breaking point too many times. All work and no play makes....blah blah, had never been in my dictionary. And I keep thinking, the more I work, the more successful I'd be.
Till really dire things happened and I've seen the need to relax, take a breather. Surprisingly, the more relaxed you are physically and mentally, the more productive you become.
I had, pretty much, the same conversation with one of my team guys once. He wanted to impress and pushed hard and I liked that. I piled on the load, pushed him harder and harder, then realised he wasn't listening to my instructions to take rest, find detachment and recharge. I saw him get slower and slower, make bad decisions and worse, none at all, and that's when I pulled him on it. We adjusted his attitude and before long, like you found, he was doing great and had become an invaluable part of the team.
I'm glad you went through those dire things and found a better way forward. Sometimes that's what it takes.
That's the saying, first used in the 1600's I believe.
This post of yours is really interesting, it leaves room for many reflections.
As far as my macro lenses are concerned, I divide them into many smaller ones.
I can keep my concentration high by taking short breaks while I work.
In general my body warns me if I'm reaching a breaking point but I tend to avoid going there.
Every week the weekend is strictly dedicated to affection, recreation and rest.
When it is possible during the summer we allow ourselves a holiday away from everything and everyone to detach the brain, it is not always possible for economic reasons but, in any case, during the summer I tend to detach for a longer period of at least 15 days even staying at home.
Lately, working in the morning, I've been taking a 45-minute nap in the afternoon before starting my various web-related activities.
This is one of the strategies that keeps a person more alert, engaged and productive.
And here's another. The recharge.
Overall, I think you're on a righteous path man, it's good to hear. I believe employers are beginning to understand the value of a little break, some rest and relaxation, to bring heightened focus and greater outcomes. There's times it's not possible, but should be enacted when it can be.
Of course, of course, at some point I grit my teeth because it's not always possible, especially in my "classic" workplace.
As far as my web activities and investments are concerned, breaks are mandatory during the working afternoon as well as the weekend off, recharging is necessary 😉
It's those breaks I've not been taking, skipping lunch or eating on the run, constantly talking on the phone rather than listening to music (when driving), pushing from one thing to the next without even a pause for a glass of water, coffee or just to deep breathe. Late night, early morning...no respite. That's what got me into the position I'm in, but luckily I know how to spot when I get close to, or over, that line I mention above.
I admire your knowing how to manage and the fattl that sak press on the accelerator.
Hold a position that you have earned and deserved, it's not for everyone.
It's always been important to me to feel like I've given my best. It has caused me issues of course, but mostly it's helped me gain better results, learn faster and find my limits. It's amazing how much further the mind can drive the body if the mindset is right.
They say, tomorrow your mind and you will rule the universe... in my opinion it's quite true 😉
The great goals like the struggles are won when I understand that I have to be well- prepared from the physical, mental, and spiritual is what is working for me right now and with good results and rewards for my life Galen is my life force, and as far as possible I do not neglect myself.
The Greeks used to say, “Mens sana in corpore sano." To do this, get a good and sufficient sleep, get up early to exercise, eat a balanced diet, meditate, pray, and be grateful to face any challenge, responsibility, or task; it is my best tool or weapon to face whatever it is.
Have a good night 🤗
That's Latin right?
Smart folks.
Yes, Galen is Latin, and those folk leave for our essence and abilities, an intelligent history to practice in our life.
Growing up, Ive always wanted to prove something to my family, especially to my father. The focus was getting unhealthy eventually because I scolded myself if I stumble from time to time. But, then I realized I am hurting myself and my father changed (he turned into someone who I didnt think he could be). So, I made adjustments on how I wanted to work on my goals. Something that would be win-win to myself and to the people important to me.
I think many could say the same thing, however I believe a person needs to prove something to themselves first and foremost, be happy and content with what they are doing to achieve that and with the results that come. I don't believe someone will do something as well when they feel compelled to do it because of someone else, rather, I believe is a person can motivate themselves, determine the compelling reason to achieve for themselves, then they're on the right track.
In the past I've promoted this ethos in my teams and worked towards helping each individual (and the team in general) find a compelling reason to work hard, own their success and failure, show consistency and persistence and basically drive towards their goals because they want to.
I guess it's something that is very specific to the situation, subjective, and because each situation has different elements, like your own with your father, what works in one case may not in another.
I am so glad I realized this because I could have been a mess if this thing was not addressed. Now I am happier of who I am and proud of who I can become.
This is a pretty good situations and feeling, it means you'll have a future more inline with the one you want. ✅
-What have your experiences been with focus and driving towards a goal?
I am battling with myself lately. I overthink too much for the things I cannot handle. I think, I've been too hard to myself for pushing it towards my goal. I worked so hard, and never give myself a rest, the reason why I feel so exhausted and drained. And because of this, I became more demotivated and unproductive.
So I reflected to myself, and I realized that I also need to rest. I have to balance everything. In order for me to focus is to help also myself to and let myself rest too.
It's good that you've come to that realisation and I think you'll find yourself getting more productive because of it. Feeling exhausted and drained (physically or emotionally) isn't conducive to productivity and has other (possibly) long-term ramifications that may make the situation worse.
It doesn't take long to find a little break, five minutes can be enough in some situations, however the time spent in that way can pay huge dividends.
Balance, as you say, is the key.
Hi @galenkp, I haven't read you for some time, but as always your publications are very important. There are a lot of seed phrases here that can bear fruit. But I'll focus on your final sentence - "Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default" - Everyone eventually lives, the simple act of breathing achieves that result, despite more or less effort. However, there is a big difference in what each person does with his or her life and how he or she decides to live it.
We can always do more and better, no matter how hard we have tried. Not in comparison to other people but in comparison to oneself, we are all different, with different abilities and goals. But having those goals clear is vital to set a path that may be more or less straight, and from which we may stray a little on the way, but being able to come back is what will give a successful result, I totally agree with you.
But to reach a destination, over or at the expense of oneself is not worth it. Besides, sometimes we leave aside on the way things that are even more important, without which, even if we reach the goal, we will feel empty.
I listened to an audio of a business coach, whose policy to be more productive was the establishment of priorities, and encouraged that these should always be in this order: health, family and work. Many are not convinced of it, but I found in that thought a great truth of life.
As always I loved reading you. Have a nice day 🌷❤️🤗💪
Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)
I like what you're saying here, clearly someone who has thought it out which means you're probably more likely to see dividends down the track. Life is life, no more and no less however with a design and create ideology one can begin to influences it to become more enjoyable which is what life should be. Sure, bad things happen, but they shape us and allow us to then shape the future a little better. That's really what's behind my design and create an ideal life phrase. That, and that search for continual improvement.
I believe that most people get it wrong...Meaning, they seek to improve for others or measure themselves against others. True enlightenment comes when one is improving oneself and measuring that improvement against their former self. There's many reasons that advantageous: Growth, development, better outcomes, satisfaction, understanding, knowledge and wisdom among them.
Life isn't about work, that's just the bullshit people tell themselves to justify the fact that they have to go to work. Life is about enjoyment, happiness, fulfillment, experiences and other such things. I think it's best to be seeking them out, to find improvement, and to create a life a person can look back on and say, yep, I'm satisfied.
When reading especially this sentence:
A word came to my mind that best identifies what every person should be looking for, and you just end your exposition with it: satisfaction.
A satisfied person feels happy, fulfilled and satisfied with what he has achieved, and although looking to the future he can go after other things, when looking at his present or past he does not feel empty.
I like many of your writings, because from your eyes you share thoughts and understandings that others can use to polish our life, that's how I see it. It is a privilege to have come across your publications that I try to read although it has not been very easy lately. Have a good night, at least here it is getting dark (Venezuela).
Not so high-powered, but, I watched my mother hit near burn-out when she was raising her family, many times over and over. Being too young, ignorant, and a little selfish, it never occurred to me that we could all make her load lighter by helping just a little bit more.
Mothers will drive themselves to the brink for their families, leaving themselves for last more times than not. Doing without because the children come first.
Being young when she got married, she needed to prove (to her family and herself) that she could do it and do it well. She waited on my father like he was royalty and he reciprocated with kindness and love. He started taking a day or two and taking all of his kids camping, leaving my mom at home.
Small and simple, but, I can see in hindsight, it was her balance.
I think we've all had that realisation, or should have. Parents do what they do for their children and are generally happy to do it. You're a parent so you understand I guess. It's nice to hear your dad pitched in to give your mom some time to herself, I think that's important and it speaks highly of his quality.
I hope you're well Swigs. Hi there. 😊
Thanks, Galen. My dad was the best.
I am doing great and I hope you are too. Life is good.
Wow, this is a great write-up @galenkp.... I can't say I'm a focused person, but I definitely know i have to be focused, and I'm working on it 100% on a daily basis... isn't life a strange thing? When you're not up to speed, you'll always want to be.
I have always wanted to be consumed and laser-focused on what I'm doing in such a way that I derive pleasure from doing meaningful work, but at the same time I notice that even keeping up with such a pace constantly gets you tired...
For me, I feel our work or whatever we do should energize us...We don't need to do it to prove anything to anyone, but the love for creating value and bettering people's lives should be the main point...
I do feel we owe ourselves that duty to take proper care of our well-being...Like Robin Sharma once said, "If you want to save the world, don't die." The whole purpose of seeing ourselves hit the pinnacle of success is not just to have it all and then feel depressed but to enjoy the journey and look back to know that created a better life for ourselves.
Knowing you're not up to speed as you say brings opportunity. If you know there's improvement to be made you have the chance to attain it.
Start with your own, be a better person, and that will reach outwards to others.
You're right.. Thanks @galenkp
I think the fact that you have always taken leadership roles will help you a lot. It will help you to be able to do things by yourself even though you do moy have anyone with you at that moment.
You will also be able to serve as a watchword for the people who are under you
I try to do the best I can and identify when I'm not so I can make adjustments.
Thanks for your comment.
When it comes to resting, there was a time I didn't rest, while trying to achieve a goal.
It got to a time I couldn't walk properly again, it was like my leg was breaking. I have to rest and eat well.
Then fire on again.
These days, I hate sleep and rest.
It has been tasking with serious setbacks, which I can't control anymore. It has also made me to think outside of the box. I'm a Web designer still in training the unavailability of some resources is hampering the success of the work. The goal must be achieved, that's what my coach said.
I keep my goals always before me, it helps me not to see the challenges around but keep pushing.
It's good to have goals (and plans in place to reach them) as that puts into perspective the challenges.
Everyone who chase greatness or yearn to be successful however at some point feel that they are not doing enough. I have countlessly been in that position hahaha. But if we continue and not pause for a while, it's at the expense of our health be it emotionally, physically and other wise.
Relaxing, having rest or break it's not bad or won't stop you from achieving that goal. Rather it would even help you stay calm in order to work effectively and efficiently.
Yep, that's what I said in the post.
And yep, this too.
You have pretty much paraphrased my post. I like original comments to be honest, those that reflect some thought after having read the post.
The rewards earned on this comment will go directly to the people( @videoaddiction ) sharing the post on Twitter as long as they are registered with @poshtoken. Sign up at https://hiveposh.com.
Can you please tell me why you keep downvoting my posts?
Congratulations @galenkp! You have completed the following achievement on the Hive blockchain And have been rewarded with New badge(s)
Your next target is to reach 79000 upvotes.
You can view your badges on your board and compare yourself to others in the Ranking
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word
STOPCheck out our last posts:
Support the HiveBuzz project. Vote for our proposal!
Why have you downvoted me?