Emotions and Me | Refugee Life

One of my colleagues said that you are too involved in your work, which is unsuitable for your mental health. The people who know me and are very close to me (the colleagues who work with me), started noticing changes related to me. I have been dealing with stress and anxiety lately and don't know how I will solve this issue. I am very stubborn but also a silent person and this kind of character and attitude are unacceptable for my work. People who work here are very outspoken and they easily can share their perspectives and opinion. The people who came from the war like me, suffer.

In my previous post, I wrote many things related to my work. Recently I have been trying to find an organization that can help me understand my labor rights. I started feeling that I have been facing unfair and biased situations at work and to understand this situation, I need a volunteer. I think employers at my work are taking advantage of my silence thinking I don't know any rights and rules of Dutch labor.

I know many of you don't like to read this kind of negative post where I only explain my problematic life. I completely understand that and because of this realization, I have reduced posting as well. I know people don't like to know about others' problems because everybody has to deal with their own problems. But yes, my Hive profile always reminds me of my growth, my life, and how far I have come. Life is not always about happiness and positivity. I believe uncertain things, darkness, and sadness are part of life as well.

This photo has taken before sunrise. I think the time was around 5.30 am, I was outside smoking and noticed this beautiful pinkish-bluish sky. I thought it would a nice idea to capture this moment because this kind of sky before sunrise, nobody notices much. Gigi normally doesn't like to go out early morning, she likes daylight but, as I start my shift at 6.00 am, I always take her out for an early morning walk.

Gigi is a very intelligent dog and she observes me and my activities precisely. When she sees me anxious and stressed, she stays silent and lies down near me. I try not to show my emotions to her but I can't hide anything in front of her tremendous "sense" ability. I don't want to see Gigi dealing with anxiety and sadness but gradually I noticed that I transfer my anxiety to her unknowingly. I should stop this situation before it's too late.

Gigi needs neutralization surgery so I am looking for a vet who can help me. I don't have much idea about the spay or neuter process of a dog, I was looking for the treatment cost and I must admit that is not cheap. But as I have been saving some money, I think I will be able to carry Gigi's Neutralization surgery costs.

My dad left for Saudi Arabia to fulfill one of his wishes. He is staying there for a month, exploring Makkah, Medina. My sister is alone in Bangladesh and I am here in the Netherlands. My personal life, family life, and professional life everything is so messed up that I don't know where I should start solving them one by one. I started feeling like this was my fate and that probably I did something wrong in life that's why I am suffering.

Despite all the negativity, something positive happened in life. I went to Utrecht City and had a great time there. The weather was nice, the trip went smoothly and I was able to gather a whole new experience in life. I have taken a lot of photos and video clips as well. I will spend this weekend editing those photos and videos.

Thank you so much for reading...

---

---

Love

Priyan...

---

^{I am @priyanarc.... An architect, a dreamer, and a passionate writer who loves to write about life. I try to present my own perspective and experiences. Please leave your feedback and criticism because it's the only way I can know and reach your mind and thought easily...}

---

Find me on:

• youtube

• Dtube

• 3Speak

• Twitter

• Instagram

---

All images used are captured by the author...