A trip to life, of life, for life - Dreemport Challenge(d)

My mom is my hero and I miss her deeply. If I had a magic Dreemie Dreemport Credit card that could provide anyone with the trip of their life, then I would use it on her. She loved to travel but due to circumstances in life, never had the financial means to do so effectively, and her bucket list as far as travel destinations were concerned remained largely untouched.

She was born in Pietermaritzburg in South Africa on 11 May, 1947, during a year in which her family was living away from their home in Northern Rhodesia (now known as Zambia). She spent her formative years growing up in Bulawayo, much of her education taking place in a Catholic Convent Boarding School. She had 2 brothers (one older, one younger) and an older sister (although she only found out about her sister and got to know her as an adult - her sister being the result of an affair that her mother had whilst her father was away fighting in Egypt during WW2, and who was sadly placed for adoption in a shameful secret which remained hidden by my grandparents for many years).

My Mom always wanted to be a social worker but again her parents did not have the funds to send her to University, although she had the grades to be accepted. Instead, she started off in an office job and eventually pursued a life in complementary therapies, helping hundreds of people to find joy, peace, and happiness in their lives. I am so proud of all that she achieved for both herself and others in her time and space.

My parents on their wedding Day, 2nd December, 1967💗

She met my dad through my grandparents...that is to say...they knew him as he used to frequent the diner that they owned and they thought he would be perfect for her! So they arranged an introduction hee hee. She was 5 years younger than him and still at school but the rest, as they say, is history. They dated and eventually got married in 1967, before going on to have a family of their own viz: me (1971), my sister (1973), and my brother (1977).

The war years broke my grandparents and they became alcoholics with my grandad also developing emphysema as a result of lifelong smoking addiction. My grandad also lost his leg in an unfortunate train siding accident, one drunk and debauched evening. My parents ended up caring for them both for many years, without receiving any financial support or otherwise from my mom's siblings. This combined with raising 3 children, meant that money was never an easy subject, although they sacrificed a lot themselves so that we did not have to bear the brunt. I later discovered that they remortgaged their property in order to pay the interest on my student loan that enabled me to attend University. Make no mistake, we kids weren't oblivious to some of the financial hardships my parents experienced and we all pitched in, in our own way to make the load a bit lighter and more manageable, but the responsibility must have sat heavy on both of my parent's shoulders.

I was a very active child. I played every sport imaginable at school and was a key member of the senior debating team. I also belonged to an external running club and did Karate. My mom was a regular taxi service! As a mom myself, I realise how much I took her for granted. Oh, how self-absorbed the teenage mind can be 😢

She read...oh my goodness could that woman read. She was never without a book in her hands and between my Mom and my Dad, it was hopeless😂...I was destined to be an avid lover of books myself. We played scrabble often, late into the night, always with a dictionary and thesaurus to hand, and I learned to love words more than I ever thought was possible. I wrote and drew often in my youth and my mom encouraged me every step of the way. Even when I was seemingly taking a break from these "hobbies", she saw the light and joy they brought me and never failed to keep reminding me of my purpose: Every year on birthdays and Christmases, I would get a set of art pencils or paints, a drawing book, a journal, a pen....and books; lots of books. She knew me...she really knew me💗She got me, she understood my layers, my analytical mind, the depth of my spirit, my philosophical thoughts, and the tenderness of my heart. She was my Mom, after all.

Donna Taggart - Time to Meet Your Mom

This is an incredibly beautiful song about a conversation between a soul and God before birth. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Mom, you were taken from us way too soon and way too suddenly. I will never forget getting that call from Dad on 27th April, 2019 (Freedom Day in South Africa). It was a heart attack. The tragedy is that it was completely preventable. High blood pressure when left unchecked is a ticking time bomb.

I could honestly write a book about my Mom and her life, so complete and amazing it was, and such an incredible person she was, but for now, let me leave that simple introduction and allow me to show her my gratitude and love by spoiling her with the trip of her life.

So getting in touch these days is more kinetic and ethereal in nature. Instead of picking up the phone or dropping her a whatsapp, I grab a line straight to Heaven. I'm on my knees and I'm just chatting to her.

So, Mom, I've met this amazing person ...
(oh really, where did you meet?)
well, we've not actually met in person...but on the blockchain...
(the what, you say?)
uh...in the metaverse... you know?
(No...I don't...what's that?)
Well, actually the metaverse is the wrong word I guess as it is just a concept at the moment...but the blockchain that's real...anyway ... remember I told you I was finally writing again, and regularly, and loving my life?
(Ok stop, I get it! I remember this conversation now hee hee...you are earning imaginary money, have I got it right?)
Aah ...um...no...(shaking my head - I can't do this lol) ok yes, Mom,...you've got it!
<Honestly, you have to understand that at this point I think: why am I trying to explain this to a woman who still referred to various whatsapp DM chats as her site, your site, my site, their site...and kept us all completely confused (and amused) with her techno lingo 😂>
...Anyway back to this woman...
(Woman?)
Mom ....yes she's a woman lol, not that it matters haha...and I feel like I've known her forever! She is a kindred spirit and has fast become somebody that I call a friend. And...she's a Dreemer of majestic proportion. Her heart is incredibly huge and her life is a manifestation of her joy, her passion, her beliefs. She gives so much of herself to those around her. Her energy seemingly knows no bounds. Truly epic! Sound familiar? 😍
(Wow! I think I'd like this person!)
You absolutely would, I haven't met anyone yet who doesn't! Anyway, she has given me a Dreemie Dreemport Challenge Credit Card...and it's kinda magical...and I can use it to give somebody special, the trip of their life. And...I've chosen to gift it to you.
(tears ensue)

Now Dreems says that you can go anywhere you want on your trip and spend as much time there as you choose. I've checked the expiry date on the card...and there isn't one!
So my gift to you today, the 2nd of December, what would have been yours and Dad's 54th Wedding Anniversary, is this:

Take a trip to Life and come and spend time with us (and especially Dad, who misses you terribly) whenever you want to...we will always be here waiting, listening, hearing your voice on the wind, feeling your heart beating in time with our own. I will keep a space empty on the bench beside me and we can just sit and watch the world go by...I know how much you loved 'people watching'😍

Take the trip of your life...and relive every wonderful memory you ever made. Be 17 again, 25, 32, and 46...visit yourself at whatever age you feel inspired to do and connect with yourself and all the lessons and love that you learned and shared in life.

Remember one of your favourite places? The View over a Valley of 1000 Hills. I asked Mark to take this footage for me as it reminds me so much of the times we spent having breakfasts, lunches, and chilltime in the area. The sound of the Zulu drums beating and echoing through Phezulu Safari Park and across the vastness of the Valley, as we take in the wonder of the hills, is food for the soul.

Drum rolls over 1000 Hills

With Dad at your Happy Place - the beach

Christmas and Anniversaries - December was always special

And finally, if you so choose, take that bucket list and rip it up because you can now visit the 7 Wonders of the World. You can trek the ancient Inca trails to Machu Pichu in the early Spring, after the rains. You can visit the Nordic glaciers and be inspired by the Northern lights in late Autumn/early Winter. You can have fun traveling through the USA in the Summer and finally pay homage to your spiritual base in India, a place you never got to visit, but a people and locale that were always close to your heart.

And when all is said and done, you can wander around one of your most favourite places in the world, Scotland, and enjoy the beautiful landscape and the wonderfully friendly people who live there. I will leave you with one of your favourite songs as played by the amazing Rohann Ludick on the bagpipes (during your memorial in your garden at home) - The Boat Song😘

In case you never got a chance to read it, here is what I wrote to you the day after you passed, and sums up why you are my choice for the Dreemie card🙏

To my darling mommy. You filled my childhood with love, laughter, a belief that the universe had bigger plans for all of us, and dreams to last a lifetime. You supported everything I have ever done, often sacrificing for me, more than I realised at the time. You gave me the freedom to pursue adventure and the courage to carve my own path in life. You have been my mommy, my best friend, my mentor, and a constant inspiration. I will always look back on our marathon scrabble games that went long into the night with the greatest fondness. You nurtured in me a love for languages and the Arts and a lifetime love for learning. I will always treasure our many talks and discussions on life the universe and everything, including water! You helped me in so many ways and shared your wisdom, your knowledge, and your love so freely with all who knew and loved you. Most of all, you lived life on your terms. You were brave and loyal to your truth and I will always admire you for that. My heart is broken and I am so incredibly sad that where you once were, is now a big empty hole in my life that can never be filled. I am just so incredibly grateful to have spent time with you so recently. I truly felt close to you in an incredibly special way. I will never get over your loss but I will be brave and get through it. I will hold you in my heart forever. I love you, Mommy. Sleep peacefully now and fly high with the angels❤

At my Happy Place with You - The Drakensberg Mountains💗

As a friend of mine, Gail McKay Fry, put it so beautifully:

Mom, you were always

my soft landing at the end of a long day.

Right now, Mom, I am so Far away from where you are. I love you and I miss you. There is nobody else I would give my Dreemie card to, and I hope you enjoyed this visceral and ethereal trip that was planned especially for you.

Please take a moment to listen to this beautiful song by Jason Wade, my favourite singer from my favourite band, Lifehouse.

A trip to life, of life, for life - Dreemport Challenge(d) - Dreemport Undefeated. This would have been my entry for the Dreemport Challenge this week. It's a little late so it won't qualify, but I wanted to write it anyway as it has a lot of meaning for me.

Note:
All photos and video footage not accredited to anyone else by source citation, are owned by myself and my family and I assert the right to use them in this article.