Batman: So close!!! But....

in #batman3 months ago

So I finally got around to watching the new Batman film, and I liked it, but….

whats with the hair?

To be fair

I think it's important to remember this whole story is happening at the very beginning of it all. Yes, everyone has cell phones, but in the ever renewing Batman mythos, he's been rewritten young for every generation of fans who care to follow the stories. This is done for relatability, and It makes perfect sense, but there are some things in my opinion, some aspects, that ought to remain the same.

So keeping in mind that Bruce Wayne is learning to be Batman is critical as to not throw the ax at the head of the director for misrepresenting the caped crusader.

Front Doors, What?

Ok, this might be stupid but it truly messed me up. One of my favorite things about the Bat is that he never uses a freaking door. As a matter of fact, you don't even know exactly how he gets in and out of buildings. We think he's using windows, but he just shows up, and they never make a sound. You can't change that about him, you just can't, not for me.

You see, Batman is supposed to instill fear in his foes, but if he shows up through the front door, if he walks slowly and you can see him a mile away, then the effect is lost. There is no way you would be scared of someone walking slowly in a batsuit, and his foes, at least on that scene agreed with me. Yes, they got their asses handed to them on a platter, but I would think, I would assume, Batman figured this out on day one. That is the reason for the Bat suit to begin with, right?

What happened to Bruce?

My other big BUT here is that Bruce Wayne never showed up, yes, he never did. You see, as its said in the very movie I am daring to criticize, BATMAN is his true self, BRUCE is the character he plays. So why didn't he play it?

Where was the spoiled rich kid who drives around on a convertible with ladies and makes a fool of himself? He is supposed to be there, this is YOUNG Batman, remember?

In the scene when he gets out of the car, he is using his same somber, I AM BATMAN and nothing amuses me face, all the way into the church. I wanted to slap the director. It was not poor acting, it was a terrible plan, terrible direction.

I have to be fair, I may hate Twilight with a passion and it's hard for me to get over the fact that the shiny diamond vampire is playing my favorite comic book character, but he is not a bad actor, he could have pulled it off, he has the chops.

But there was good too.

I loved the focus on the detective aspect of the comics, on the mystery, on the mental games. You see, it was important for Riddler to be redeemed in my view. He is, after all, a psychopath whose intellectual prowess has tested Batman to insane levels, and this is exactly what he was in this film.

The opening scene sets a perfect mood for the villain, and in my opinion it's the best scene in the whole movie. I would love to see more of this, more of the darkness showcased in future films, but I may be setting myself up for disappointment.

Now the Cat, that was too fast

Another elemental part of the mythos, at least in my opinion is that Batman is not supposed to know who the cat burglar is. At least, not for a long time. He is supposed to fall in love with mystery. But, on this film, five minutes into meeting Selina, he knows everything about her.

The casting however, that, was, perfect. Zoe is a great catwoman, not only because of her beauty, which is feline like, but because she has the talent to pull of the sexy yet not weak persona needed.

Do I recommend it?

Well, it doesn't matter what you think of my opinions. You have to watch it, you have to draw your own conclusions and see if I'm full of shit, or my criticisms are valid at all.

Will you enjoy it? I'm sure you will, if you can get past the quirks, and can sit still for three hours, I think you will not regret watching the film.

Did you watch it already?


I accidentally fell for the hype and left sort of disappointed. Nobody told me it was going to be 3 hours long, either. So I was sitting there confused why the movie hadn't ended yet. I really should have forced a bathroom trip before hopping into the seat. The movie definitely had its moments but at some points felt like a pale imitation of Dark Knight.

As long as we're wringing the franchise for all its worth, why don't we get a modern movie made in the style of the 60's TV show? Balance out all the dark grittiness with some goofy fun. It could be a disaster if done wrong, but a classic if handed to the right team.

you know, this might be the only 3 hour movie in a long time that Ive been able to watch in one sitting. I, for one, Im the rare type of dude whos never finished a single movie of the Lord of the rings. Too long, and they put me to sleep in a hurry.

Three hours is too much, I have to admit.